Happy birthday, baby girl

Happy birthday, baby girl. Tomorrow, you’re five months old.

I began this blog before you were born. I started writing to help process the emotions and profound sadness I felt when your birth mother refused to agree to the adoption.

I didn’t know how to deal with the sadness, so I started to write.

And now that you are here, crawling around on the floor of the house we bought for you, with your bright toothless smile, I can’t begin to process the feelings of joy and happiness.

I can’t describe the feeling when I come get you in the morning, and you flail your arms and legs with excitement as you laugh uncontrollably. And then, at night, as you fall asleep in my arms, there is a peace and contentment that surpasses words.

I’m using the voice function as I write this, which means I’m speaking these words rather than typing. And as I speak, you’re looking me in the eyes and smiling and laughing at the sound of my voice.

Words fail to describe the feeling of happiness your laughter leaves in my heart. And in your mommy’s heart.

You have brightened our already wonderful lives in every way imaginable.

Daily I marvel at the joy that you brought us with your smile and your presence.

Tomorrow you are five months old, and you are our little girl.

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